Saturday, February 6, 2010

Please Look Into The Camera More. Please.



See that? See it? It is a nice piece of DVD box art. Which apparently is so rare these days that it isn't even funny. Seriously. I noticed something at work recently. DVD box art is really, really pathetically bad. Of nearly a thousand DVDs, I found, maybe, possibly a dozen that were decent. Almost every single one of involved the exact same formula. What is this formula you ask?

1. Put all your lead actors on the box.

2. Have all your lead actors looking directly out at the shopper as though they are trying to seduce them with their eyes.

3. Alternatively, if it is a Rom-Com you may have the two lovers staring longingly at each other. Also sad movies may have the actors staring up or down with mopey expressions. 

Here's an example: Ironically enough taken the basic version 1 Disc of the Inglorious Basterds, the top image was the special edition. 

So yea, come out DVD picture picker people! You get this job practically done for you. Take a movie's poster. They frequently are already perfectly acceptable, granted many are used, and still follow the rules listed above. Point is I don't care if cheap-o lame brain Rom-Coms have shitty box arts, but I'd like to see something moderately compelling, you know like how Lord of the Rings had a giant ass ring symbol and elvish on it. Of course all the individual releases had shit covers on them, so basically this trend doesnt seem to be going anywhere anytime soon. 

Bummers.

Console Games of '09

Okay you never really asked for it. But you're gonna get it regardless! 
My favorite console games from last year:

Rock Band 2:

Yes, it came out in '08. It still had me turning on my 360 more often throughout the year than any other release in '09.

Resident Evil 5:

It is the Fifth in the series. With a plot that makes no sense, but combat that while being strangely restrictive somehow also has a fairly decent sense of accomplishment and good feel behind it. Arguably weaker in almost every area compared to RE4, it nevertheless is a damn good game. 

Uncharted 2:
Drake is undoubtly a character built specifically to appeal to people, and he does. He is incredibly charming and the graphics are good enough to make you believe that he and his comrades in arms are all living people. The gunplay feels light years ahead of the first game, melee combat is still awesome, sure they removed the puzzles but it is a very fun very rewarding game. 

Demon Souls:
Because if you really shouldnt enjoy playing games. You should have to work your way through them. You should have to learn every precise nuance to every enemies attack style and maybe just maybe you'll have a chance at victory. Doubtful. But hey it could happen. I mean the game doesnt even tell you how to beat the game. It isn't linear, it never tells you where to go. It starts you off and then you don't get so much as "HEY! LISTEN!" It shouldn't exist, I'll never beat it, and a part of me doesnt even like the game, but I can't deny some part of me adores it.  

Shadow Complex:

Its Metroid, in the real world. With a decent enough story to boot. Combat is strangely satisfying for a game that is pretty much auto aimed. Rag dolls be blessed. 


Anddddd... I might just have to do another post just to cover all the handheld games I played. Because there was alot and I will need to glance them over once more to decide which are the worthy ones. 
Stay tuned.